If Wishes Were Horses
by SkipToTheEnd
Summary: Based on Season 3's 'The Wish'. Cordelia makes her wish, but this time Spike's in town looking for a cure for Drusilla. Along the way he runs into some old friends and new foes, but what will happen when he and Buffy finally face off...?
1. Chapter 1

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Based on Season 3's 'The Wish'. Cordelia makes the wish, but this time Spike's in town. Wackiness ensues…

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement, though I have unashamedly borrowed some lines from the show by way of an homage… The first scene is straight out of the episode but only to give some context, so please bear with it!

**Chapter One**

Cordelia hurried down Main Street, shocked by the desolation around her. She'd always complained about how pitiful Sunnydale was before, but right now she'd take it all back in a heartbeat. In the distance a siren wailed, someone screamed, and she urged her feet to move faster.

There was a blur of motion, then Xander Harris was standing in front of her. He looked weird, too confident, but she didn't have time to think about that.

'Well, whaddya know? Cordelia Chase,' he leered, looking her up and down.

'What is this, some kind of sick joke? Harmony told me you were dead!'

'Now, why would she say something like that? Let's think…'

'Listen to me,' Cordelia gasped urgently, 'we have to find Buffy. She'll figure out a way to save us. She was supposed to be here, and as much as it kills me to admit it, things were better when she was around.'

'Buffy? The Slayer?'

'No, Buffy the dog-faced girl! Duh! Who do you think I'm talking about?'

'Bored now.' The voice was creepy, childlike but laden with menace. Cordelia watched, amazed, as Willow Rosenberg, chief nerd and general loser, slowly approached with an odd, feline grace. 'This is the part that's less fun,' Willow pouted. 'When there isn't any screaming.'

Cordelia suddenly noticed the S&M chic they were both sporting. 'What's up with you two and the leather?'

'Play now?' Willow purred, as if Cordelia hadn't spoken.

'It's not that I don't appreciate your appetite, Will,' Xander grinned, 'but I thought we agreed it was my turn.'

Willow whined and ran her fingertips across Xander's chest.

'No,' Cordelia gasped, outraged. 'No way! I wish us into Bizarro Land, and you guys are still together? I cannot win!'

'Probably not,' Xander said, features sprouting into ridges and fangs. 'But I'll give you a head start.'

'No!' Cordelia gasped, dropping her bag and bolting. _I have to find Anya, find out what the hell she did and put it right!_

Suddenly an iron claw gripped the back of her neck, throwing her to the floor. Her last thought before her head hit concrete was _Buffy would know what to do…_

* * *

Seated on his throne, the Master looked up at the sound of raised voices outside his audience chamber. He glanced down at the girl in his arms; her wide eyes met his, filled with fear and unwept tears. 'Stop looking at me while I'm eating!' he hissed, but her gaze didn't waver. Disgusted, he toppled her onto the floor.

The curtain swept back in a puff of dust. Expecting his two favourites back from the hunt, the Master said, 'What news on the Rialto?'

'It's a bridge in Venice, innit?' said a smoke-roughened voice with an unmistakeable Cockney twang. 'Thought you were meant to be up on all things cultural, Pops.'

'Spike,' the Master hissed, rising. 'You show your face here?'

'Heard this was a right proper party town these days,' Spike said conversationally, swaggering into the chamber and looking around. 'Might want to fire the help though, this place is a pigsty.'

The Master glanced out through the curtain and saw both his guards lying on the floor, clutching various body parts and groaning.

Spike followed his gaze, and said with a sniff, 'Sorry 'bout them, they didn't believe that my invite was in the post. So then,' he clapped his hands, 'what's the what– who do we kill for fun around here?'

'Master?' Both vampires turned as Xander and Willow approached. 'What happened to…who's this?' Xander asked.

Willow smiled at Spike, a speculative glint in her eyes. 'Like the hair.'

'Cheers, luv,' Spike said, grinning like a cat with a canary. 'Wanna check if my collar and cuffs match?'

'Back off,' Xander snarled, pushing between them in a blur of black leather and yellow eyes.

Spike laughed. 'Easy, tiger; I won't get Kitty _too_ dirty.'

'Enough!' roared the Master, and Xander stepped back, still glaring at Spike. He put both arms around Willow, who nuzzled up against his throat, eyeing Spike even as she licked Xander's neck in long, slow strokes. 'Xander, Willow – what have you to report?'

'Had a prime kill,' Xander said, eyes flickering from the Master to Spike and back. 'An old crush, actually, 'til that wannaslay librarian showed up.'

The Master snarled. 'He'll be dealt with soon enough.'

'Weird thing,' Xander went on. 'Girl kept talking about Buffy - "Gotta get Buffy here". Isn't that what they called the Slayer?'

The Master prowled towards them. 'She talked of summoning the Slayer here, now, at this time, and you didn't kill her?'

'Well, they had crosses,' Willow pouted.

'Pfft,' Spike said in the background. '"Ooh, they had crosses", scary. Protect me from the scalding pain…'

'Spike,' the Master said, turning towards him. 'You'll give me a good reason why you're here, and you'll do it quickly.'

'What, can't a bloke look up his family when he's in town?'

'We are not family,' the Master growled. 'You are the mongrel end of my bloodline, nothing more. Now tell me why you're here.'

Spike opened his mouth, wisecrack poised on the tip of his tongue, but thought better of it at the last minute. 'It's Dru,' he said. 'She's weak, needs healing up. Thought a spot of R&R at the Hellmouth Sanatorium might do her some good.'

'But why are you _here_?'

'Didn't know where else to go, did I?' Spike sniffed. 'Thought you might know a bloke who knows a bloke, could give us a heads up on how to get her back to her psychopathic best.'

The Master returned to his throne, steepling his fingers with his elbows resting on the throne's arms. He watched Spike consideringly, who lit a cigarette and stood smoking it like he hadn't a care in the world. But the Master knew him well enough to spot the tremor in his fingers, the tightness around his eyes. 'Very well,' he said finally. 'I may be able to help you restore Drusilla. But I will want something in return.'

'Imagine my surprise,' Spike deadpanned, one hand flattened on his chest. 'What've you got in mind?'

'I have plans coming to fruition that I will not see fail. You will work for me for one week, during which time you will kill that cursed librarian and his band of merry fools and bring me their skulls for candlesticks.'

'Master,' Xander interjected. 'Forgive me, but we don't need help from this…this Sid Vicious wannabe.'

'Oi!' Spike shouted, but the Master shouted louder.

'Silence! This is a vital time, Alexander - the plant begins operation in less than twenty-four hours. You will work with Spike however I tell you to. Meanwhile, kill this girl before she contacts the Slayer, or I'll see you and Willow kissing daylight.'

'As you say, Master,' Xander nodded, chastened.

Willow snickered, winding her fingers into his hair. 'Ooh, "Alexander"…you made Daddy mad.' She spotted the girl lying at the Master's feet. 'Master? Are you gonna eat that?'

'Go ahead,' the Master smiled, fondness in his reptilian eyes.

Willow knelt and pulled the girl's head onto her lap, stroking her hair gently away from her face. 'Aw, are you scared little girl? Don't worry, I've gotcha.' She vamped out with a grin, biting down hard on the girl's slender white neck. Xander and Spike watched appreciatively as Willow fed with gusto, mewling to herself with pleasure.

'Proper little firecracker, ain't she?' Spike marvelled.

'I'm warning you, hands off,' Xander snarled.

'Or what?' Spike chuckled. 'I've got a hundred-and-some-odd years on you, mate; be like a poodle takin' on a leopard.'

'Enough!' the Master roared again, patience almost gone. 'Don't make me come down there!'

Willow's yellow eyes flickered between them, her grin made gruesome by a smear of blood. As she looked at Spike, something considering came into her expression. She stood and her face smoothed back to human, her bloody smile now even more grotesque.

'Wait…Spike?' she said. 'Of the Master's bloodline?'

'S'right,' Spike said proudly, fleetingly imagining licking that blood right off her peachy face.

'William the Bloody,' she said softly, head cocked to one side. 'Made by Drusilla, one of Angelus's happy little family.'

'Will? How d'you know anything about this jerk-off?' Xander glowered, grazing his hand across the small of her back.

Willow shrugged one shoulder delicately. 'Once a book nerd…'

'I don't like it,' Xander said, voice hard and flat.

'Don't worry, baby,' Willow said, turning her up face to him. 'You're my guy.'

'Damn right,' Xander murmured, cleaning her bloody mouth with his tongue. Spike watched, fascinated, pants stirring in appreciation.

'Spike,' Willow said, turning back to him, 'do you like puppies?'

'Not 'specially,' Spike said, trying and failing to interpret the glee in the redhead's eyes as she sidled up to him. 'Too much fur, sticks in my teeth.'

'Aw, I think you'll like _my _puppy,' Willow purred, grinning up at him.

'Will,' Xander said, 'what're you doing?'

'Master,' Willow said pleadingly, turning huge eyes to him, 'if we kill the girl, can we play with Puppy? Please….?'

The Master smiled. 'Very well.'


	2. Chapter 2

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Based on Season 3's 'The Wish'. Cordelia makes the wish, but this time Spike's in town. Wackiness ensues…

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement, though I have unashamedly borrowed some lines from the show by way of an homage…

**Chapter Two**

Everything was dark, soft, warm…but something was tickling at the edges, something bright and harsh and painful…she resisted, wanting to stay where everything was fuzzy and safe, but found herself rushing instead toward the cracks of light…

With a groan, Cordelia sat up and found herself laid out on the table in the middle of the Sunnydale High School library. Relief and nausea slugged it out for dominance.

'Hey!' said a voice from somewhere behind her.

'Giles!' Cordelia said frantically, recognising the cultured accent. 'It's all my fault! I wasn't - I made this stupid wish…'

The librarian was at her side by now. 'Come on, please lie - '

'No!' she interjected, clutching his arm. 'You have to get Buffy, Buffy changes it. It wasn't like this, it was better. I mean, the clothes alone…but people were happy…mostly, and – wait…' She slid off the table, brain racing. 'Why are you here and she's not? I mean, you were her Watcher.'

'How do you know I was a Watcher? I've never - ' He broke off, turning his head at the sound of something thumping and scratching outside. Immediately he strode into the book cage, grabbing a cross and a stake. Cordelia sighed in relief; this was more like it, everything would be okay now.

'Now,' Giles said from inside the cage, 'I want you to start again and explain everything very carefully.'

The door slammed shut under Willow's hands. 'You're in a big cage.'

* * *

Outside in the parking lot, Oz's van screeched to a halt. Oz, Nancy and Larry leapt out, looking around carefully. They took a few steps towards the library when Larry stopped, clutching Oz's arm. 'Hold up, man, I forgot the crossbow.'

'Oh. Well, Giles must have one…'

'No, he asked me to bring it, remember? C'mon, we'd better go back for it.'

Oz paused, looked around. It all seemed quiet enough… 'Okay.'

They hurried back to the van, Nancy clambering into the back while Larry slid into the passenger seat. Oz froze, hand on the door handle. Something was prickling in his mind, some premonition that if they left, something bad would happen.

'Oz?' Larry said urgently. 'C'mon man, we don't have time!'

'Yeah,' Oz said slowly. 'I think I'm gonna go inside. You two'll be okay without me, right?'

'What? Well, yeah, I guess…'

'Cool,' Oz said, tossing the keys to Larry and slamming the door. He clutched his stake tighter, slinking toward the school building. 'Daniel Osborne, you better know what you're doing…'

* * *

Cordelia's heart was racing, Xander's icy hand clamped over her mouth. She watched in horror as Willow waved the cage key in front of Giles's face. He slammed the cross against the mesh, making Willow flinch back, but Cordelia knew it wouldn't be enough. When his eyes met hers, they were filled with dread and defeat.

_C'mon, brain, wake up! What was that move they taught me in self-defence class…something about his instep…? Oh, will that even work on a vampire? I wish Buffy was here! No, hang on there, missy - you're Cordelia Chase! It'll take more than a pair of skanky, undead, ex-geeks to get the better of you!_

Cordelia gasped against Xander's hand as his fangs slid into her neck. Everything receded into the distance; all she could hear was her own ragged breathing, all she could feel were two points of intense pain and the sensation of blood, of life, rushing out of her. Her body throbbed with a mixture of fear and arousal, intensifying as Willow pressed her lean body up against her and sank her teeth into her throat.

* * *

Oz crept into the library, freezing in horror when he saw the Master's favourites feeding from Cordelia. Behind them, trapped in the book cage, Giles spotted him and waved frantically, silently. Oz willed his feet to move, mind racing as he tried to figure the best strategy. _Ah, what the hell – I never was Strategy Guy._

Breaking into a run, Oz gabbed Willow and spun her around. Her features blurred and settled into human, and she smiled like a little girl.

_You have the sweetest smile_, Oz thought randomly as he plunged his stake through her pale, creamy skin.

'No!' Xander roared through the cloud of dust, thrusting Cordelia away from him and launching himself at Oz.

Cordelia landed hard, head spinning. Dimly she heard Giles shouting something about a key. She looked round and saw the book cage key lying in the dust. Her fingers felt numb, pain radiating out from somewhere deep inside her, but she managed to grab hold of it. She got to her knees, unsteady, and fumbled the key into the lock before slumping to the floor.

Giles sprang out of the cage, grabbing Xander and pulling him away from Oz. He pressed the cross against Xander's face, and the vampire howled in pain and rage. Without a backward glance, he took off through the stacks.

'Are you alright?' Giles asked Cordelia, kneeling beside her. He took out a clean linen handkerchief from his pocket and ripped it sharply into two. He folded one half into a pad and pressed it carefully against a bite on her neck. 'Here, put pressure on this.'

'Thanks,' Cordelia mumbled, pressing trembling fingers against her neck as he tended to the second bite.

'Thank God you arrived,' Giles said over his shoulder to Oz. 'Are Larry and Nancy…?'

'They're alive,' Oz said. 'Should be here any minute.'

'Thank God,' Giles repeated, eyes squeezing closed for a second. 'Now, uh, Cordelia, is it…? You need urgent medical help - do you have a family we can take you to?'

'No, I need to tell you…about the wish…' Cordelia broke off, woozy. Bright lights flashed behind her eyes. 'Please, take me with you…'

'She's unconscious,' Giles said to Oz. 'We'll take her back to my apartment. Call Martin, tell him to meet us there with a transfusion kit.'

Oz nodded and grabbed the phone.

* * *

'NO!' roared the Master in a rush of pain and rage. 'My Willow, gone? How could you let this happen!'

'Master, please,' Xander said, face livid with a cruciform burn, tears flowing freely. 'I didn't…I couldn't save her.'

'On your knees,' the Master demanded. Xander fell to his knees, still weeping for his love, his sire. Spike shifted uncomfortably; fun though it was to watch the whelp humbled, it hit too close to home. A vivid memory of Prague flashed before his eyes, the roar of the mob swelling in his ears, and he clenched his jaw and forced the visions away.

The Master bent down to stare into Xander's eyes. 'Be quiet,' he said, and Spike recognised the hypnotic voodoo that Dru was so good at. Xander went still immediately, like a mouse facing down a cobra. 'Of all the disappointments in my six centuries on this Earth, you are by far the greatest. You failed to kill the girl, you failed to protect my Willow, and now we have a Slayer on her way here on the eve of the opening!'

'Master, please,' Xander said again, helpless. 'I'm sorry, so sorry…'

'Too little, too late,' the Master barked. He stroked Xander's face with both hands, claw tips scraping gently across his skin. 'Such a shame…'

With a powerful twist, he wrenched Xander's head clean off. Brushing dust from his hands, distaste painting his twisted features, he ascended to his throne.

Spike was impressed; _maybe I should start treading a tad more respectfully_. 'Got a Slayer infestation, eh?' he said. 'Nasty business. But you know what I find works real good with Slayers?' He paused, grinned. 'Killing them.'

'And I suppose you can do that?'

'Yeah, I done a coupla Slayers in my time. I don't like to brag - '

'Spare me,' the Master interrupted. 'I have immortality stretching before me, but still no time to listen to your hollow boasting. I have a proposal.'

'Well, I'm flattered and all…' Spike began, tailing off when the Master's eyes narrowed. He eyed the dustpile and cleared his throat. 'I mean, uh, go on.'

'I know how to restore Drusilla. But the terms of our agreement have changed; I want you to bring this Slayer to me, alive. Once I have her, I will give you the cure.'

'You want her alive? Why don't I just finish her off for you, save you a job?' Spike asked, then grinned, 'Besides, I quite fancy goin' for the hat-trick.'

'I must be the one to kill her,' the Master said. 'It is written.'

'Ah, written,' Spike nodded, mock-solemn. 'Well, you're the boss, boss. Alive it is.' He paused. 'So, uh, if I c'n ask…what's this puppy that Red was goin' on about?'

'Oh, him,' the Master said, waving a dismissive hand. 'A thorn in my side.'

'So who is he?'

A sly look came over the Master's face, and he smiled nastily. 'Why don't you go see for yourself?'


	3. Chapter 3

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement, though I have unashamedly borrowed some lines from the show by way of an homage… I've also changed the Master's fiendish plan slightly.

**Chapter Three**

'Rupert?' came a groggy English voice down the phone. 'Do you know what time it is?'

'Yes, and I'm sorry, Wesley, but this can't wait. I need the Slayer.'

'Buffy? You know the procedure, Rupert – you must apply to the Council, wait for them to verify - '

'Yes, I understand,' Giles cut him off, 'but it's imperative that I see her. Here.'

'I haven't seen her in days,' came the reply, clipped and brusque.

'Well... when will you?'

'I haven't the foggiest.'

'Yes, well, you _are_ her Watcher. I'd expect her to at least check in to - '

'There is a lot for her to deal with here, you know,' Wesley interrupted, distinctly tetchy now.

'Yes, I'm aware that there's a great deal of demonic activity in Cleveland,' Giles retorted.

'So you'll appreciate that we have enough here for Buffy to focus on - '

'Well, it happens, you know, that Sunnydale is on a Hellmouth!' Giles said hotly, irritated beyond politeness.

'I don't really think…'

'It is so!'

'Rupert, I rather suspect you've been reading too many of your own grimoires.'

'Just give her the message, if you ever see her again.' He slammed down the receiver. 'Pillock.'

Martin came down the stairs, running a hand through his dishevelled blond hair.

'How's she doing?' Oz asked.

'She's asleep, she'll be okay,' Martin said. 'She was lucky.'

'Yes, for once it seems luck was on our side,' Giles said. 'Thank you for coming over. I know that doctors seem to be being targeted lately, so it's likely more dangerous out there for you than for the rest of us.'

Martin nodded. 'Glad I could help – that's why I got into this gig, after all.'

Nancy appeared from the kitchen with a plate of sandwiches, Larry behind carrying a pot of tea and cups on a tray. Oz looked at the food, then looked away, settling for a cup of strong black tea. He sat on a dining chair, slumping a little as fatigue overtook him.

'So what now?' Larry asked, munching on a sandwich.

'We wait for Buffy Summers,' Giles said. 'When Cordelia wakes up, hopefully she'll be able to explain whatever it is she was trying to tell me earlier.'

'That reminds me,' Martin said, putting down his cup to reach into his pocket. 'She was wearing this, I took it off for safety's sake.' He dropped a necklace into Giles's outstretched hand, gold links coiling in his palm.

Giles looked down at the pendant, the green stone winking in the low light. Something about it tickled his mind, and he frowned. 'I've seen this somewhere before…'

'Well, you can check it out tomorrow,' Nancy said, mother hen instincts in full swing. 'For now, you need to eat something, then get some sleep.'

'Yes, of course,' Giles said absently. 'Um, I know it's almost dawn but you're all welcome to, uh, to crash here – I only have the one sofa, I'm afraid, but there are spare blankets in the cupboard.'

Everyone nodded, weary beyond belief. Giles glanced up at the ceiling, wondering who the strange girl in his bed was, and exactly what secrets were locked up in her mind.

* * *

Spike descended the steps into the dark, dank basement, keys dangling from his fingertips. Sure enough, there was a fully fitted jail cell at the bottom, just like the Master had said. He saw movement inside; a man stirred, lying on his side in the darkness. Chains trailed from his body up to a heavy ring in the wall.

'Well now, what have we here?' Spike said loudly. He cocked his head, listening. 'No heartbeat. Interesting.'

The man's head turned a little, and Spike saw the thinnest edge of his profile. He frowned; familiarity stirred. 'Who _are_ you, mate?'

'William?' It was a croak, dim and faint, but Spike's unbeating heart clenched.

'Angelus?' he whispered. 'Can't be…'

The man turned, sat up painfully against the wall. His hair was filthy and matted, his features twisted with hunger and pain, but it was unmistakably him.

'Angelus!' Spike exclaimed, throwing the cell door open and crouching beside him. 'Man, what are you doin' in here?'

'You know the Master,' Angel said, grinning faintly. 'If you don't keep in line…'

'Yeah, I know,' Spike grinned. 'Worse than Dru in one of her moods. She's here, by the way – well, not here, in a warehouse, and she's not up to full strength, but…man, this is great!' He broke off, laughing. 'I can't believe it's you, you dropped off the face of the planet! How long've you been here?'

'I'll gladly tell you all about it, but can it wait 'til I'm somewhere less…painful?'

'Oh yeah, course,' Spike said, fumbling for the key to the shackles. 'Hold up, Scroteface is lurkin' about upstairs – is there another way out?'

'Yeah, I'll show you,' Angel said urgently.

'Right then,' Spike said, then went still. 'But - what did you do, exactly?'

'Spike, please,' Angel begged.

'Hmm. "Spike, please" – haven't heard that one since you, me and Dru ate that showgirl in Paris. Usually it was more like,' Spike adopted a deep, pompous tone, '"William, do as you're told or I'll rip your thumbs off". You sure you're you – still playing with the full deck?'

'Of course I'm me,' Angel said, vamping out and yanking hard against his chains. 'I'm going crazy down here, they haven't fed me in a week.'

'You do look a bit bony,' Spike mused.

'So let me out, now, or I'll string you up by your ankles and drain you dry, one drop at a time.'

'Promises, promises.'

'William!' Angel snarled. 'Don't test me, boy.'

Spike stared for a second. 'Yeah, it's you,' he said finally, watching Angel revert to his human face. As he leant in to reach the shackles, Spike caught a glimpse inside Angel's loosely buttoned shirt. He paused, slipped open the last button carefully, winced at what he saw. Scores of wounds marred Angel's smooth flesh; some open, some scabbed, some silvery-faint, covering every muscular plane.

'What the hell did you do to piss him off this much?' Spike asked, captivated again by this man's naked torso. Somehow, the bloody wounds made it even more appealing, and he resisted the urge to taste him.

'Spike, listen to me,' Angel said urgently. 'We don't have time for this now.'

'I've got time,' Spike said, sitting down Indian-style and lighting a cigarette. 'Sun-up and all – nowhere to go, no-one to do…so how's about you tell me a story, and if I like it then maybe I'll help you.'

Angel glowered, eyes glinting. 'The Master is opening a factory here in town, and I'm trying to stop him.'

'Why's that exactly – not a fan of capitalism?'

'He's rounding up humans like sheep, putting them in cages. When the factory opens, he'll hook them up to machines and bleed them every few days. He'll be able to keep them alive indefinitely, a never-ending supply of fresh blood. He plans to open these factories in every town, every city, until the human population is in chains.'

'Sounds like a right old knees-up to me,' Spike said, exhaling smoke into the rank air. 'I must've missed the part where I'm meant to care.'

'He thinks it's the future, the way forward, but he's wrong - it'll just take all the fun out of the hunt,' Angel said, voice dropping to that low, wheedling tone he knew Spike couldn't resist. 'C'mon Spike, what's the point in feeding if there's no fun in it? If you can't feel a warm body go limp in your arms, taste the fear spicing the blood, watch the spark in the eyes go dim…?'

'Yeah, right,' Spike said, arousal swirling through him. 'That is the best bit. But hold your horses; he's got you cut to ribbons and chucked in prison 'cos you don't wanna play house? Seems unlikely.'

'He knows I'm a threat to his scheme,' Angel said. 'Think about it – who but Darla ever got to stick around him for long, huh? He's terrified of the idea that anyone else might be as strong as him. How long d'you think it'll be before it's you in here instead of me?'

'Nah, never happen. I'm leaving town in a week, right after he tells me how to cure Dru.'

Angel laughed, breath catching. 'Cure Dru, right. Why would he tell you how to cure her when the two of you combined will be stronger than him? Wake up, my boy.'

'That two-faced, bat-faced bastard,' Spike hissed, eyes narrowing, flicking his cigarette away. 'Evil, heartless, psychotic I may be, but I keep my bloody word! Right then, let's get you out of here.'

Angel's brown eyes followed Spike's every move, hungry and hollow…and far too human.

'No,' Spike said, standing, backing away. 'You're…something's up, you're not you at all! Wait a second - don't tell me you're playing for the home team now?'

Angel stared him down. 'Spike, you don't understand.'

'That's it, innit?' Spike spat, incredulous. 'God, and you thought you could fool me? _Me!_' Spike paced. 'Un-bloody-believable! You, who knew me inside out – you thought I'd fall for that lame act? What is it, eh? Who's gotten to you?'

'Let me out, and I'll explain it to you.'

'Forget it,' Spike sneered, throwing the keys into the corner and whirling to leave. 'Let yourself out.'

'I know how to cure Drusilla.'

Spike froze.

**Author's note: **Please review, whether it's praise or constructive criticism - it's amazing how encouraging it is. Thanks!


	4. Chapter 4

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement.

**Chapter Four**

Oz carefully loaded the crossbow, checking the feel of the mechanism as the parts moved and whirred in harmony. Satisfied, he removed the bolt and laid it down on the table. Beside him, Larry and Nancy were carving stakes while Giles leafed through the stacks of books haphazardly piled up on the living room floor. Oz glanced out of the window; the sun was shining brightly through, dust motes dancing like flecks of gold. It was so peaceful, tranquil, like it used to be before the Harvest.

'What time is it?' said a fuzzy voice behind him, and he turned to see Cordelia descending the staircase carefully. She was still wearing the oversized T-shirt and pyjama pants that Giles had handed to Martin the previous evening.

'Ah, almost twelve,' Giles said, standing. 'How do you feel – can I get you something to eat?'

'Yeah, sure, thanks,' Cordelia said. 'Anything low fat.' She gingerly felt the bandages on her neck.

'They bothering you?' Oz asked, eyebrows raised.

'No. Well, not in a pain way, just in a psychologically scarring way,' Cordelia said with a faint smile. 'What happened – how did we get away? I don't remember anything.'

Giles emerged from the kitchen with a mug of tea and bowl filled with cornflakes. 'We have Oz to thank for that, he arrived just in the nick of time.'

'Oh. Thanks,' Cordelia said shyly.

'Here, take a seat,' Oz offered, standing. He cleared the weapons away and Giles set down the breakfast tray. Cordelia was too famished to complain about the budget brand cereal, wolfing it down hungrily.

'Eat slowly,' Giles warned. 'I'll make you something more substantial once that's settled. Now then,' he took a seat opposite her, 'do you feel up to talking? Only I need to know what it is you were going to tell me yesterday, and how you know about my being a Watcher.'

Cordelia held one manicured finger up, chewed, swallowed, and took a deep breath. 'Well, it all started with this new girl, Anya…something. See, this isn't how the world is supposed to be – Buffy should be here.'

'Yeah, you said that yesterday,' Larry said.

'Excuse me, I wasn't finished? So anyways, I sorta made this wish that Buffy had never come to Sunnydale, only I didn't know that Anya was this, like, scary bad fairy type.'

'Bad fairy?' Giles asked, perplexed.

'Yeah – one minute she's all coiffed and moisturised, next thing I know she looks like Freddy Krueger's ugly sister.'

'And you're saying that the world is like it is because you made a wish about the Slayer?' Giles asked.

'Am I not speaking English?' Cordelia said to Oz, who looked back steadily. 'Didn't I just say that?'

'I'm just having trouble understanding what on earth you're prattling on about!' Giles retorted.

'I don't prattle!' Cordelia exclaimed, offended.

'Guys, time out,' Oz said. 'Let's stick to the crucial, shall we? Find out who this Anya is and how to undo whatever mojo she cast.'

'Yes, quite,' Giles said, cleaning his glasses. 'Thank you, Oz. I'm afraid I'm rather tightly wound since all this…' He paused. 'Wait a moment…Anya… Cordelia, did she give you this?' He pulled out the pendant from his pocket and handed it to her.

'Yeah. She said it was a good luck charm.'

'I think I know who she is,' Giles said, grinning. He scurried back to the piles of books, toppling them until he found the volume he wanted, a thick brown-leather tome. He brought it to the dining table and everyone crowded around as he flicked through the pages. Pointing out a woodcut print that took up half a page, he asked, 'Cordelia, is this her?'

'Oh my God, yes!' Cordelia shrieked. 'See what I mean about the skin issues?'

'So who is she?' Nancy asked, peering over Cordelia's shoulder.

'Her name is Anyanka, sort of a…patron saint of scorned women.'

'So she's sorta like the fairy version of Lorena Bobbitt?' Nancy asked.

'Not exactly,' Giles said. 'She's a demon who grants wishes. Needless to say, they never turn out for the good of whoever's stupid enough to make one.'

'Hello, sitting right here!' Cordelia groused.

'Oh, yes, sorry…current company notwithstanding, of course,' Giles said hastily. 'So you wished that Buffy had never come to Sunnydale – which means in your world, she did.'

'Certainly would help to have her here,' Oz mused. 'Keep the vamp ranks in check.'

'But hold on,' Giles said, 'if your world is, is normal, like ours used to be, then Buffy must have averted the Harvest.'

'So the Master never rose,' Oz said, catching on.

'Of course,' Giles breathed. A wistful look came over his face as he imagined Cordelia's world for a moment.

'So, if we can just get this Anya chick here,' Larry said, 'then Superbrain can unwish her wish and everything'll go back to normal?'

'In theory, yes,' Giles said. 'Cordelia, how did you, uh, summon her in the first place?'

'I didn't, she came to me.'

'And how did that happen?'

'Ho boy, that _is_ a story! Well, I was dating this guy - a total loser by the way, who I never would've looked at twice if it weren't for Buffy making him the teensiest bit cool by hanging with him…' Catching Giles's impatient frown, she hurried on, 'Long story short - he turned out to be a jerk, I dumped his sorry butt, then Anya shows up and starts saying how he never deserved me, and didn't I wish something awful would happen to him.'

'So all we have to do is find some guy to upset you, then boom! She shows up, you make a wish to put everything right, we're all sipping cocktails by sunset,' Larry said. 'And please, let me be the first to volunteer for that job.'

'Something tells me it'll be more complicated than that,' Nancy said.

'Look,' Giles said, 'I'm going to have to research this Anyanka thing further. I have some more volumes at the library.'

'I'll come with,' Larry said.

'Thank you,' Giles nodded, picking up his black courier bag and throwing in a few books. 'Oz, Nancy, stay here with Cordelia, make sure everything's alright. If Buffy Summers should arrive, keep her here until we get back.'

'What about me?' Cordelia asked. 'What can I do?'

'Just rest up, have plenty to eat and drink,' Giles said. 'If you think of anything else that may be useful, call me at the library.'

'Okay,' Cordelia said, watching the two men leave.

'So,' Oz said, dropping a pack of cards on the table, 'poker?'

* * *

Spike ducked the low-hanging curtain. 'Dru, sweet, you in here?'

'The King has asked me to the ball,' said a child-like voice from the shadows, 'but my carriage keeps running away from me.'

Walking around the huge canopied bed, Spike saw Drusilla crouching on the floor trying to coax a rat toward her. 'Pss, pss, pss,' she whispered to it, rubbing her fingertips together.

'C'mon, pet, up you come,' Spike said, drawing her to her feet. 'Let's get you back in bed, shall we?' He glanced around, frowning when he spotted a young man's body in the corner. 'Dru, did you let your dinner get cold again?'

'He tasted like cherries,' Drusilla pouted. 'I can't abide cherries.'

Spike tucked Drusilla under the layers of silk and lace that she loved so much. 'There now, snug as a bug.'

'Where did you go?' Drusilla asked, dark eyes huge in the candlelight. 'It was all black without you.'

'Had to go see someone important,' Spike said, lifting her pale hand to his lips and trailing kisses up her bare arm. 'But then I ran into an old friend, and he told me about this nifty book that'll tell us how to get you all better again.'

'Yes, the book,' Drusilla breathed, eyes glazing. 'All that glitters…but the mean librarian won't let us borrow it.'

'Don't fret ducks, I've sent the boys to persuade him,' Spike smiled nastily. 'And now, you need to eat something. Want me to get you a pizza delivery boy?'

''m not hungry.'

'You need to eat, luv,' Spike insisted, firm but gentle. 'How 'bout a newborn? Tasty but not too filling.'

'My Spike,' Drusilla purred, stroking the planes of his face with trailing fingertips. 'You won't leave me, will you?'

'Never,' Spike said fiercely, eyes ablaze. 'You're mine, 'til this stinking world crumbles and burns.'

'Don't leave me,' Drusilla murmured, eyes fluttering closed. 'Don't go to that nasty little girl.'

'Dru? Pet? What're you on about - what girl?' Spike asked, but Drusilla was gone, dead to the world.

Spike frowned, unsettled. 'I need to go kill something.'

* * *

'I can't believe it's so late,' Giles said, hurrying through the dark parking lot to his car. 'We should have been back long before sunset.'

'Yeah,' Larry said. 'I did say that, like, twenty times.' Neither of them noticed the two vampires that hurried into the library behind them. 'It's like you weren't even hearing me.'

'I'm afraid I do get rather caught up when I'm researching,' Giles admitted.

The two men climbed into the clapped-out Citroën and Giles gunned it out onto the street.

'Well,' Giles said, 'at least now we know what we're dealing with. It's good to know that my Watcher muscles haven't completely atrophied.'

'Whatever. We just need to get back and do this ritual thing so we can all get back to normal.' Larry drummed his hands against his knees, impatient. 'Can't this thing go any faster?'

'This is fast enough,' Giles snapped, protective of his little car. 'Better to arrive a few minutes later than in a body bag.'

Larry rolled his eyes and glared out of the window. Up ahead he saw Jefferson Park, and a white delivery van parked up on the grass. 'Wait,' he murmured, noticing the blacked out windows. 'Giles, look – over there!'

Both men watched the van's back doors open, two vampires springing out to herd a shuffling line of sobbing people.

'Oh, bloody hell,' Giles said, wrenching the steering wheel towards them. The car careened off onto the grass, jolting around as the tyres hit the uneven ground.

'Ow!' Larry cried, head smacking into the ceiling.

'Sorry,' Giles muttered, braking sharply.

'Argh!' Larry yelled, neck whiplashing forwards.

'Sorry!' Giles said again, grabbing a cross and crossbow from the back seat. 'Do you have a stake?'

'Yeah,' Larry winced, rubbing his neck.

They leapt out of the car, rushing over to the van. Giles held up the cross like a talisman and the vampires shrank back, hissing and snarling.

'Run!' Giles shouted to the prisoners. Larry covered him as the people streamed out into the darkness, his eyes on the vampires. One of them grinned suddenly, and Larry whirled around to see another vamp right behind him.

'Giles!' he shouted, bringing up his stake, but the vampire was on him before he could use it.

'No!' Giles shouted, raising his crossbow. Someone slammed into him from behind and he fell hard, dropping the cross. Panic seethed through him as his attacker stood on his outflung arm, wresting the crossbow from his numb fingers and smashing him in the face with the stock. He cried out as his nose buckled, hot blood gushing over his face. He couldn't see Larry, but he heard the younger man scream and the sound of crunching gristle.

Suddenly the weight lifted from his arm. He sat up, wiping his face, knowing that the smell of so much blood would attract other vampires like a beacon. He saw Larry's body, still and glassy-eyed, half his throat torn away. Giles swallowed down nausea and grief, grabbing the crossbow and staggering to his feet.

Behind him, a dark-haired man was grappling with one of the vampires. The others had vanished, and Giles caught a glimpse of dust sparkling in the air. The stranger punched the vampire hard, and it staggered back away from him. Giles raised his arm and calmly sent a bolt right through its heart.

'Thanks,' the other man said, wincing with pain. There was blood on his hands and his shirt.

'No, it's me who should be thanking you,' Giles said, holding a handkerchief to his bleeding nose. 'They would certainly have killed me without your assistance. Look, you're clearly injured and I have a car – can I take you somewhere?'

'You're Rupert Giles.'

'How did you - '

'I'm looking for a girl, her name is Buffy Summers.'

'Buffy?' Giles breathed. 'How do you know her?'

'I don't. Not yet, anyway.'

'I see,' he said cautiously. 'And you are…?'

'Angel.'

**Author's note: **Please review, whether it's praise or constructive criticism. Thanks!


	5. Chapter 5

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement.

**Chapter Five**

Three heads whipped around at the sound of a knock on the door.

'Still daylight,' Oz said.

'Only just,' Nancy replied.

Oz stood, grabbed the crossbow and went to the door. He opened the hatch and peered out into the fading light. A small blond woman glared back at him, eyes hard and cold.

'Rupert Giles?' she asked.

'No, I'm Oz. Buffy Summers?'

She nodded tightly. 'You gonna let me in?'

'Sure,' Oz said, sliding back the bolts to open the door.

Buffy strolled in, dumping her backpack by the coat rack. She looked around, a faint sneer lifting her scarred lip.

'Buffy?' said Cordelia, getting slowly to her feet. 'Is that you? I mean, it looks like you… but boy, I thought _my_ Buffy was lacking a fashion clue…'

'Who the hell are you?' Buffy asked, looking her over.

'It's me, Cordelia.'

'Which should mean something to me because…?'

'Oh wait, of course…technically, we've never met.'

'Well, I'm sure you're used to people pretending not to know you,' Buffy said cruelly.

'Hey, idea,' Oz said. 'How 'bout we all drop our weapons and sit down for a sec?'

'Weapons?' Cordelia frowned.

Buffy threw her hands up. 'All I want is a straight answer. What's so urgent that I had to drop everything and come all the way out here to the ass end of nowhere?'

'It's a pretty long story,' Cordelia began.

'We need you to save the world,' Nancy interrupted.

'Or, okay, apparently quite short…'

'Right, great, why not?' Buffy said sarcastically. 'Wanna make that a little _more_ vague and unhelpful for me?'

'Please, guys,' Oz said, 'can we pretend we're on the same side?'

Buffy threw her leather jacket onto the kitchen hatch and leaned against it with her arms folded. 'Fine, we're all bonding. So what's the sitch?'

Oz and Nancy glanced at each other, wondering where to start.

'Okay, let me,' Cordelia said. 'I made this wish; only, I didn't know I was even making a wish really…but that's not important…so, this demon appeared and granted the wish, and now the Master's all 'rise and shine, let's rule the world with an iron claw'. But it's not meant to be this way. I know you, in the world I come from, and you killed him before things got like this.'

Silence. 'Did you pick up a head injury along with those bites?' Buffy snipped.

'No, it's true,' Oz said. 'Giles found the demon – name's Anyanka.'

'Whatever,' Buffy said, standing straight and planting her fists on her hips. 'I can't say I care too much who she is. Just point me at her and watch me go.'

They heard footsteps, then the front door opened. Giles came in, saying over his shoulder, 'Here we are. Please, come on in.'

Nancy stood and went to help Giles with his bulging courier bag. 'Giles, your face – are you okay?' She looked out through the doorway and asked, 'Larry?'

Giles shook his head. 'I'm sorry. We stopped to help some people who were under attack, and he…'

'Oh, Larry, no,' Nancy breathed, eyes filling with tears. 'But thank God that you got away.'

'I have this fellow to thank for that,' Giles said, gesturing to the man behind him.

'Angel!' Cordelia exclaimed, wishing she was wearing her turquoise dress – now ruined with her own blood – rather than Nancy's too-big jeans and sweater. 'Oh my God, it's good to see you! Wait - you are still good here, right?'

'Do we know each other?' Angel frowned.

'What is it with you?' Buffy snorted. 'Does everyone you meet want to wipe you from their memory?'

'I told you already, I'm not from this world.'

Buffy opened her mouth, paused, then smirked and said, 'Nah, too easy.'

'Buffy?' Angel said softly. 'You're Buffy Summers.'

'How come everybody suddenly knows who I am?'

'I waited for you – I was supposed to help you.'

'Help me what – audition for Homeless of the Year?'

'Miss Summers,' Giles cut in, 'my name is Rupert Giles, I'm the one who called you here.' He glanced over at Angel, who was holding his side, eyes closed. 'Angel, you should sit down, you're injured.'

'I'm fine,' Angel insisted. 'We don't have time for a rest break, we need to find the Master and shut him down.'

'The Master?' Buffy frowned. 'I thought I was killing some betty named Anyanka?'

'We talked about this,' Giles said to Angel. 'If we can reverse Cordelia's wish, the Master will cease to exist. Our energies are much better directed to summoning Anyanka than to a…a suicidal wild goose chase.'

'And what if you fail, or the spell can't be undone?' Angel persisted. 'We need to go after the Master now, while we have a chance of stopping him.'

'Guys?' Buffy said, holding up a hand. 'Not following ya – who am I killing?'

'The Master,' Angel said.

'Nobody!' Giles exclaimed.

'Are you always this cautious?' Angel asked him.

'You have no idea,' Cordelia interjected. 'Angel, are you sure you're okay? Only, you look pretty beat up. I mean, I know you'll heal quickly, vampire special bonus and all, but - '

'You're a vampire?' Giles squeaked, leaping away from him. 'You never said!'

'Good job, Jeeves,' Buffy said, pulling a stake from some hidden pocket. 'What exactly were you Watching, your own heinie?'

'No, wait!' Cordelia protested, standing in front of Angel. 'He's got a soul, he's one of the good guys.' She turned her head to whisper over her shoulder, 'Right?'

'Yes,' Angel said. 'How did you know that?'

'Oh, we're really good friends where I come from,' Cordelia smiled, batting her eyelashes.

'What is this, a singles bar?' Buffy said. 'Soul or not, my job description's pretty clear on this one.'

'Now wait just a moment,' Giles said, 'this is fascinating, unprecedented! Besides which, this man saved my life - we can't just kill him out of hand.'

'So I should, what, take him out on a date?' Buffy sassed, glaring at Cordelia's stifled giggle.

'Guys,' Oz said, quiet authority radiating. 'Larksome though this is, we have a world to put right.'

'Right. So here's the plan,' Buffy said. 'Jeeves, you - '

'Giles,' he corrected her firmly.

'Yeah, you,' Buffy said. 'Seems to me like you're Book Guy, so you stay here and work on summoning the Demon Bride. Meantime, I'm gonna find this Master and take him out.'

'I'll come with you,' Angel said.

'Thanks, but I prefer flying solo.'

'Fine,' Angel shrugged. 'But I know where his factory is, how to get in, what security he's likely to have in place…plus I'm still strong enough to take out anyone who gets in our way.'

Buffy gave him a long, cold, considering stare. Cordelia couldn't get over how different she was to the sunny, good-natured Buffy she knew.

Finally, Buffy said, 'Fine. You come with me. I'm going to accept that you're on the level, but you put one foot outta line, I'll be bringing you home in a paper bag.'

'Understood,' Angel said. 'Giles, I hate to ask…do you have any clothes I could wear?' He held out the tattered edges of his shirt, showing the rips and bloodstains.

'Of course,' Giles said. 'Follow me.'

'It's all bloody GIBBERISH!' Spike snarled, hurling the book against the wall. His minions flinched, edging towards the doorway before he turned his wrath on them. 'Bloody Angel, I should have _sodding_ known I couldn't trust the weasel!'

'Angel?' Drusilla said plaintively from the end of the huge banqueting table.

Spike clenched his jaw. _Nice going, genius_, he said to himself. 'Dru, sweet, I'm sorry I didn't tell you,' he said, crouching beside her chair. 'I thought I'd keep it as a surprise, invite him to your coming out party.'

'Spider webs,' Drusilla hissed, 'all made of pretty lies to catch me and snatch me.' She grasped at the air with her fingertips. 'You know something about him, something you're not telling.'

'I thought you were better off not knowing,' Spike said gently. 'He's not the monster we knew, not any more.'

'They've taken away my Angel,' Drusilla moaned, clasping Spike's shoulder with one hand and pressing the other to her eyes. 'All gone away where I can't see him.'

'Yeah,' Spike said, humouring her. 'But listen, luv, we're better off without him anyway, right? You're my girl, I'll look after you. See how much bother I'm going to, to get this cure for you?'

Drusilla lowered her hands, laying her palms flat on the table. 'Yeah,' she said, 'I see. But the book's no good, my pet, not without…' She closed her eyes, swaying in her seat.

'Without what?' Spike asked. 'What d'you see, pet?'

Drusilla raised her right hand, fist clenched. 'All that glitters…is a key.' Her hand opened, palm flat, facing upwards.

'Right,' Spike said slowly, 'that makes sense – the book's not gibberish, it's code, innit? So c'mon, Dru, where's this key?'

'In the dark,' Drusilla whispered, 'with the bones and spiders.'

'A crypt, you mean?'

'Yeah…'

'But where, ducks?' Spike's voice was tinged with frustration. 'Lot of crypts in dear old Sunnyhell.'

'I don't know, I don't know,' Drusilla groaned, hands clasped over her ears.

'Shh,' Spike soothed, taking her in his arms and stroking her hair. 'It's alright, pet, don't take on so. I'll find it.'

Drusilla calmed a little, walking her fingers up Spike's lapel. 'You always make it right, my love. Always take care of Princess.'

'Too right,' Spike said distractedly. His mind whirled, weighing and dismissing options for what to do next. _Way I see it, I can either find this Slayer and take her to the Master as a peace offering, hope he doesn't want my guts for garters for letting Puppy out of his cage and that he wasn't lying about knowing Dru's cure…or I find Angel and torture him until he tells me everything he so conveniently left out before._

Resolution made, Spike smiled. 'Right then – torture it is.'

Drusilla's eyes lit up.


	6. Chapter 6

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement. I always imagined this world's Buffy to be more like Faith, so go with that…also, the Master's factory layout is different than in the episode, imagine it's much bigger.

**Chapter Six**

'Here it is, listen: "In order to defeat Anyanka, one must destroy her power centre. This should reverse all the wishes she has granted, rendering her mortal and powerless again." You see? Without her power centre, she'd just be an ordinary woman again, and all this would be…well, as it's meant to be,' Giles explained.

'Okay,' Oz nodded. 'How do we do that?'

'Do we even know what her power centre is?' Nancy asked.

'I believe it may be symbolic, like…putting a stake through a vampire's heart. In any case, I think our best chance is to complete the summoning ritual in this book and speak with Anyanka. There's a list of spell components here - I don't have all of them, so first thing in the morning I'll go to the Magic Box and get the remainder. If Cordelia can't take back her wish, we may still be able to bargain with Anyanka, find out what price she asks to put things back as they were. If that fails, then Buffy may have to…well, let's plunge screaming from that bridge when we come to it, shall we?'

'Tell me how to help,' Oz said.

'Me too,' Cordelia piped up. 'I feel kinda responsible.'

'_Kinda_ responsible?' Nancy exclaimed, and Oz gripped her hand across the table, shaking his head.

'Look, I know you think I'm just some dumb ditz who ruined your lives by making a wish,' Cordelia said hotly, 'but believe me when I say that I want to get things back to normal just as much as you do. More, actually – I mean, you don't know even you're missing iced non-fat mocha frappuccinos.'

'We have those here,' Nancy pointed out. 'This isn't Mars.'

'Oh. Well, how about the fumigation parties at the Bronze?' Cordelia said, standing to pace the floor. 'Or…taking some dish up to Lookout Point in Daddy's car? Or wearing anything that isn't - ' she held up her hand, Nancy's sweatshirt trailing over her fingers, 'badly fitting and the colour of sludge!' She stopped, tears filling her eyes. 'I miss all that stuff. I even miss school – how wrong is that? And Xander…' Her shoulders slumped and she buried her head in her hands. 'I miss Xander. Oh God, what have I done?'

'Shh, it's alright,' Giles said, putting a fatherly arm around her shoulder.

Sobbing, Cordelia turned her face into his sweater. 'Everything is wrong here,' she sniffled. 'It's almost the same, but with a side order of no cigar. It makes it even harder.'

'Nancy,' Giles said over Cordelia's bowed head. 'Could you put the kettle on please?' Grasping Cordelia's shoulders in both hands, he looked earnestly into her eyes. 'Now listen to me,' he said gently, 'we're going to get Anyanka here, and we're going to put everything right. You'll see – you'll be drinking a…mocha…iced…thingy before you know it.'

'Thanks Giles,' Cordelia said, managing a weak smile. 'I knew I could count on you.'

Buffy peered around the corner cautiously, Angel looking over her shoulder. At the front of the factory they could see a row of machinery, covered in twisting tubes and cables. To one side was a wooden cage, filled with frightened people. To the other was a stage, a crowd of vampires clustered in front of it.

'That's him,' Angel whispered, nodding towards the stage, 'the Master.'

'Nice. So here's the plan – I'm going in there to kill them all, and you're gonna stay out of my way.'

'Well, well, if it isn't me old mate Angel,' said a drawling voice behind them.

Buffy turned to see a lean, punky vampire with bright blond hair leaning casually against a stack of packing crates, smoking a cigarette and grinning.

'Nice threads, very spiffy,' he said to Angel, who looked self-consciously down at Giles's borrowed corduroys and chunky sweater. 'Who's Pollyanna?'

'Buffy, the _Vampire Slayer_,' she ground out. 'And you're about to make best friends with my Dustbuster.'

'No thanks, luv; I prefer my sucking done the old fashioned way,' Spike smirked, tilting his head and rolling his tongue against his palate. 'So you're the Slayer, eh? Prettier than the last one I killed.'

Buffy hesitated, thrown. She'd never had a vampire talk back to her like that – and, to her further discomfort, his curling tongue and tight black jeans were proving to be _way_ too distracting.

'Spike,' Angel hissed quietly, stepping in front of Buffy. 'What are you doing here?'

'Came to join Team Angel,' Spike said, flicking his cigarette away and straightening, thumbs hooked into his belt loops. 'You might be a stinking, traitorous worm of a vampire, but I reckon you're right about this factory nonsense.' He gestured towards the corner. 'I mean, did you see those…those Suck-o-matics up there? Where's the romance, I ask you?'

'Why are we wasting time talking to this guy?' Buffy said to Angel. 'Don't tell me – he's got a soul too and you're both members of the Fluffy Friends Gang.'

'Soul?' Spike exclaimed, blue eyes widening. 'So _that's_ what it is – I knew something smelled fishy!'

'That is _such_ a lame pun,' Buffy said, rolling her eyes.

'No, I din't mean soul as in 'sole',' Spike began, then stopped. 'Hang about, why'm I trying to explain myself to you? Much rather be fighting you to the death.'

'Mutual,' Buffy sneered, eyes blazing.

'Well, step up then, petal,' Spike said, settling into a hip slouch and running one hand down his body. 'Come take me.'

Buffy swallowed down the unexpected surge of lust that almost overwhelmed her. Before she could react, Angel was grabbing Spike's lapels and the two vampires became a blur on the factory floor.

Buffy checked around the corner, and noticed a couple of the Master's flunkies walking towards them to check out the commotion.

'Fantastic,' she muttered, stepping into the whirling frenzy and coming out with a vampire's throat in each hand. They were both strong and she enjoyed the feeling of superiority as she managed to keep them apart. 'Listen, brainboxes, you've summoned the cavalry.' She pushed them away disdainfully, and they both straightened their clothes, glaring at each other, trying to pretend their egos weren't bruised like a peach.

'Hey,' came a hard voice from around the corner. 'Who's lurking back there?'

Spike grabbed Buffy's upper arm. 'Listen, luv, we don't have time for you to argue with me – whatever I say to these goons, go with it, okay?'

'Why the hell - ' Buffy began, but stopped as Spike jerked her around the corner with him.

'Only me,' Spike said casually to the two vamps. 'Brought a snack with me but she got a little feisty; was just reminding her who's in charge.'

Buffy glowered up at him. 'You are so dead,' she said through gritted teeth.

'See what I mean?' Spike laughed, and the two vamps chuckled. 'I like a kitty with claws as much as the next bloke, but this one's more of a hellcat.'

'She's a tasty piece, though,' said the taller vampire, running his tongue over his elongated fangs. 'Bet she's hell on wheels in the sack.'

'Oh, that is _it_!' Buffy snapped, wrenching her arm from Spike's grip. With a cool economy of movement, she staked the tall vampire before he saw it coming and felled his friend with a reverse roundhouse. She pounced on his prone form, knees striking concrete as he turned to dust underneath her.

'Blimey,' Spike said behind her, something husky in his tone. 'Steady on, luv, you'll do yourself an injury.'

'I'll do you an injury,' Buffy said, manhandling him out of sight and shoving him up against the wall.

'Ooh, how d'you know I liked the dominatrix kick?'

'You're a pig,' Buffy spat, swinging her arm back to stake him.

Somehow, in a whirlwind of black leather, Buffy suddenly found herself pressed up against the wall, shoulder blades biting painfully into the bricks. Her heart thumped as she stared up into the vivid blue eyes inches from her own. She glanced down at Spike's full lips as he said throatily, 'Have a care, pet – p'raps you're not as dominant as you thought.'

Buffy's brain went blank – no snappy comeback, no piercing insult – and her arms seemed to have forgotten how to work. She was intensely aware of every point of contact between their bodies; his pleasing weight pinning her to the wall; the firmness of his grip on her waist and throat. Spike's grin slipped, his eyes darkening. Buffy could only stare back, wondering if he had some kind of hypnotic power even as she tried to deny the swelling lust that was pulsing and throbbing through her.

Suddenly she was staring at the opposite wall; Angel had tackled Spike to the floor and was straddling him, vamped out and snarling as he landed punch after punch.

_Snap out of it, Buff!_ she told herself sternly. On shaky legs, she grabbed Angel by the scruff of the neck and flung him to one side.

'You know what?' Buffy hissed, releasing her confused emotions in a torrent of anger. 'If you two can't be any more helpful than this, then get outta here before I add your names to my hit list. Got it?'

'Screw you Dorothy, and your little dog too,' Spike sneered, pushing himself to his feet. 'I came here in good faith, willing to help, an' all I've gotten is abuse! Well, forget it – go get yourselves killed, see if I care.' He hopped up to sit on a packing crate, wiping the trickle of blood from his nose with his thumb. 'Got myself a ringside view of the slaughter, so go get 'em!'

'I don't have time for this,' Buffy said, angry and horny in equal measures. 'I'm going in there to finish the Master – you two can do whatever the hell you want.'

'Wait, Buffy,' Angel said, watching her slip around the corner. He growled, turned to Spike. 'Why are you really here?'

'Was gonna trick you, kidnap you and torture you,' Spike shrugged, licking blood from his thumb. 'But then I figured maybe you've got a point about this factory lark, and now I know you're all soul-having then p'raps we can do a deal.'

'What kind of deal?'

'I help even up the odds for your little two-man army against the Master, and you tell me the key to that delightful red herring you threw in my path.' He smiled grimly at Angel's expression. 'That's right, Soulboy, I figured it out. Cunning bit of chicanery, that, I'm almost impressed – you told me where to find Dru's cure right enough, thinkin' I'd never be able to use it, so you wouldn't have to lower yourself to a lie.' He hopped off the crate and prowled towards his grandsire. 'But then, you never did give me enough credit.'

'I gave you far too much,' Angel sneered. 'I'm assuming it was Drusilla who found out about the key?'

'Meaning?'

'You never were the brightest spark, Spike.'

'Shut your hole! You don't get to act all superior to me, not when you're runnin' round at the Slayer's feet like her pet poodle!'

Angel growled, fists itching to punch Spike again, resisting with a monumental effort. 'Buffy needs my help right now - I'll deal with you later.'

'Not if I see you first, mate,' Spike muttered at Angel's back. He smiled, turned and stalked away.

After three steps, he pulled up short. 'Hang about; if he gets dusted, I'll never get that key…oh, _bloody hell_!'


	7. Chapter 7

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: Most of these characters aren't mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement. I always imagined this world's Buffy to be more like Faith, so go with that…also, the factory layout is different than in the episode, imagine it's much bigger.

**Chapter Seven**

'No! Please, somebody help me!' sobbed the girl as two of the Master's minions, both doctors in their previous life, dragged her from the wooden cage. One zapped her with a taser and they loaded her into a harvesting machine.

Up on the stage, the Master smiled an alligator smile. 'She's still alive, you see, for the freshness. This machine will keep her that way indefinitely.'

The minions quickly hooked the girl up, attaching a feeding tube and catheter, linking her to a heart monitor. At the push of a button the machine rumbled to life, slender needles arcing over to pierce her trembling flesh. The coiling tubes filled with rich, red blood, swirling into a reservoir at the base of the machine. One of the minions took a wine glass, turning a tap to fill it with the girl's lifeblood. The assembled throng of vampires was entranced, by the wonder of the machine and by the strong coppery scent of fresh blood. The glass was passed up to the stage, where the Master raised it above his head.

'Welcome to the future,' he toasted the crowd at his feet.

'To the future!' they echoed, oblivious to the slender slip of death pushing her way among them.

Reaching the front, Buffy raised her crossbow and fired. Quicker than she could follow, the Master grabbed the vampire next to him and pulled her into the path of the bolt.

Buffy raised the crossbow again, but it was knocked from her grasp. She blocked the clumsy follow-up, ducking to hammer her attacker's ribs with a flurry of punches, smiling grimly when she heard them crack. A stake appeared in her hand and the vampire exploded into dust.

Buffy spared a glance behind her, taking stock. Everything was chaos; some vampires were running, some turning towards her, some still unaware of what was happening. Beyond the crowd she saw Angel open the cage, herding the prisoners out. A few tried to run, but most of them grabbed anything that could be used as a weapon and waded into the fight. Buffy smiled coldly and blocked an attack from her left without thinking, dropping into a sweep and staking the fallen vampire where she lay.

For a while Buffy's world consisted only of fighting, instinctive and simple; a vampire popped up, she did what she had to do. At some point Angel appeared at her back, fighting with a piece of wood broken from the cage. The Master had disappeared from the stage and Buffy let her frustration at the missed opportunity fuel her, lending a vicious edge to each punch, each kick.

From the corner of her eye, Buffy saw Angel stumble to his knees, a tall dark vampire looming over him. Then, suddenly, Spike was there, grinning wildly. 'Play nice,' he snarled, shoving a shard of packing crate through the tall vampire's back. The dust settled on Angel's shoulders as Spike helped him get unsteadily to his feet.

'Why did you - ' Angel began.

'Didn't do it for you, mate,' Spike interrupted. 'You owe me a key.'

Buffy snap-kicked her opponent's knee, staking him easily as he screamed and fell. She turned to the next, but suddenly there were no more. 'Where'd everybody go?'

'All over the floor, luv,' Spike said admiringly, gesturing to the drifts of dust everywhere. 'You were like a machine, it was quite somethin' to behold.'

'Are you okay?' Angel asked her, holding his ribs with one hand. 'You're not hurt?'

'In better shape than you, by the looks of things,' Buffy replied, raising her eyebrows. She looked around, assessing the battlefield. About half of the former prisoners were still standing, one or two fallen but alive, the rest no more than broken corpses. 'We need to get these people somewhere safe, I guess,' she said. 'This ain't my town – any ideas where?'

'Giles will know,' Angel said. 'We can steal one of these delivery trucks, take them all over to his place 'til we figure something out.'

'Sounds like a plan,' Buffy said. 'You two can handle that; I'm gonna check this place out, see where the Master got to.'

'Um, are we missing something, pet?' Spike said. 'Not wearing a white hat, here – 'm not gonna help shepherd these lost lambs anyplace. Might be up for a spot of killing, though, if you fancy a hand.'

'Why would _you_ want to help me kill the Master?' Buffy asked suspiciously.

'Aside from having no morals to speak of, and no scruples about killing one of my own, you mean?' Spike asked flippantly, turning serious as he went on, 'How 'bout 'cos he's a double-crossing, back-stabbing, lying, cheating, eviler-than-thou pain in my neck that I've dreamt about killing ever since I got turned – that do you?'

'Fair enough,' Buffy said evenly.

'No way,' Angel glowered at Spike. 'I'm not leaving you here with her, with nobody to watch her back.'

'Oh, I'm very happy to watch her back,' Spike smirked, tilting his head at Buffy to demonstrate.

'Both of you, shut up before I stake you!' Buffy spat out. 'God, you're like children – overgrown, perverted, blood-sucking children!' She turned to Angel, all cold fury and coiled energy. 'These people can't stay here – someone needs to get them to safety, and I'm not leaving without the Master's dust in my hair. If Spike wants to tag along, that's fine with me – I'm more than happy to end him if he tries anything.' She glared at Spike, fist tightening around her stake.

'You do know how to sweet-talk a guy,' Spike grinned. 'Go on then, Angel dearest, toddle along with your little charges.'

'Buffy,' Angel tried again earnestly. 'I don't like this, Spike told me he - '

'Don't care,' Buffy interrupted. Without a backward glance, she stalked towards the office area at the back of the factory.

'You heard the girl,' Spike said, waving his fingers. 'Toodle-oo.'

'I'm warning you – if she doesn't come back alive, you don't get the key.'

Spike just glared at him, then turned and loped after Buffy. Angel stood watching, torn.

'Sir?' said a tremulous voice behind him. Angel turned to see a petite redhead, clutching a hand to her bleeding neck. 'Please, can you help us?'

'Of course,' Angel sighed, casting one last glance over his shoulder before turning to help the survivors.

'What's the game plan, then?' Spike asked.

'We find the Master, I put a stake in him - then maybe in you - and get the hell out of this god-awful town.'

'Simple, direct, violent - I like it,' Spike said. ''Cept for the stakin' me part, that is. Although, if you want me to stake you - '

'Finish that thought and you're dust.'

'Right-o,' Spike said cheerfully, holding his hands up.

Approaching the first office, Buffy kicked down the door and stormed in. After a quick sweep, she stalked out and kicked down the next door, then the next.

'Um, Slayer?' Spike said, trailing her into the fourth office. 'Don't get me wrong, I'm all for the kickin' and the stompin', but is this the most effective technique?'

'I don't need lessons from you on how to slay vampires,' Buffy retorted, swinging to face him, fist raised. 'Unless you want to give me a hand with the practical?'

'My hands are all yours, pet,' Spike said, closing the distance until their toes were touching.

Buffy shoved him away roughly. 'What is it with you? God, you have to be the most…disgusting…perverted…_evil_ vampire I've ever met!'

'Baby, those are my best points,' Spike grinned, rubbing his hand across his flat belly.

Buffy gulped, her mind racing away into the realms of fantasy where it was her belly he was caressing, her hands on his skin…

'Like what you see, luv?' Spike asked softly.

'What? No!' Buffy blustered. 'I'm here to kill the Master, not make out with some…stupid…British guy!'

Her breath was knocked out of her as Spike pinned her up against the flimsy dividing wall. 'Never said anything about makin' out,' he drawled, letting his grip tighten. 'Happy to oblige, though…and if you want my opinion, Master's long gone…nobody here but us chickens…'

Buffy brought her hands up to Spike's chest, meaning to shove him away but finding herself gripping his lapels instead. Her head swam; slaying always made her horny anyway, but there was something about this guy…some connection between them that she couldn't put her finger on…suddenly, it seemed too much effort to fight any more.

'Last I heard, this isn't the real world anyway,' she breathed. 'In which case, doesn't really matter what I do, does it?'

'Right,' Spike agreed, not knowing what she was on about but liking the gleam that appeared in her eyes.

'So what, you're all talk and no action?' Buffy sassed, scarred lip lifting in an inviting grin. 'Show me what you got.'

Spike stared into the Slayer's hazel eyes; they were beautiful, deep and sorrowful and so expressive. _Did she really just say…wait, Dru…I can't do this to her…_

Then Buffy's mouth was on his, open and wet and oh-so soft. He groaned at the sensation of her hot tongue in his cold mouth, body reacting instinctively, one cool white hand coasting under her top as the other tugged her hair free from its braid…


	8. Chapter 8

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: Most of these characters aren't mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement. Please take a moment to review, it makes my day!

**Chapter Eight**

Angel cut the van's engine, looking warily at the warehouse beyond the windshield. 'Are you sure this place is safe?' he asked Giles. They were down by the docks, empty and desolate in the moonlight yet full of unspoken menace.

'As safe as anywhere is these days,' Giles replied. 'Come on, we have to move quickly.'

Angel went to stand by the van's back doors as Giles hurried over to the warehouse, knocking on the door with a set pattern of knocks. After a moment a hatch opened, then the door swung inwards. Giles waved his arm and Angel opened the van, helping the wounded climb down and making sure each one had someone to help them. A few people in fraying scrubs appeared from the warehouse, one man pushing a squeaking gurney, helping those most badly injured get to safety. Angel kept watch, eyes roving from one pool of shadows to the next.

'That's everyone,' he heard Giles say, but his focus was instinctively narrowing to the sound of a glass bottle rolling across concrete somewhere close by.

'Get inside,' Angel said to Giles.

'What is it?'

'Just do it, now,' Angel said in a tone that left no room for argument.

Angel watched the darkness expectantly, and a dark-skinned vampire appeared from behind a stack of shipping containers. He was thin and drawn, hunger etched into every line on his face. Angel dropped into a fighting stance and the vampire charged him, feral and crazed.

Angel ducked, flipping the vampire over his head to land hard on its back. He had no stake, so he went to grab the vampire's head in both hands. Slippery and quick, the vampire slithered out from his grasp and rose to its knees. It sank its teeth into Angel's leg, desperate for blood; Angel vamped out without thinking, shaking the vampire free and kicking it hard in the face. It flew several feet, landing with an audible crunch. Faster than thought, Angel was on top of it, lifting it by the lapels of its filthy jacket and dumping it onto one of the splintered wooden posts along the edge of the dock.

Without stopping to let the dust settle, Angel loped across the cracked tarmac to the warehouse door. As he got closer, he heard Giles arguing with a woman inside. 'He's a friend,' Giles was saying, 'his name is Angel.'

'He's a vampire!' the woman exclaimed. 'How do we know he's not one of the Master's flunkies?'

'I can assure you, Sheila, he's one of us,' Giles said. 'He has a soul, and he saved my life, not to mention all these people.'

Angel reached the doorway and three heads turned to look at him, one a short dark-haired woman and another a lean blond man in faded blue scrubs.

'Martin, Sheila,' Giles said. 'This is Angel.'

'Nice to meet you,' Angel said, respectfully staying outside the doorway.

Martin nodded to him. 'If Giles trusts you, that's good enough for me. Angel, come on in.'

'Thank you,' Angel said, stepping inside.

Sheila sighed. 'Fine, whatever, ignore my opinion. I have work to do.' She ducked behind a heavy curtain, footsteps quickly fading.

Martin barred the warehouse door with heavy iron bands. 'Come on, the treatment room's this way.' To Giles he added, 'We got everything set up as soon as you called.'

'Is it really safe here?' Angel asked him, following. 'I mean, can't the vampires just come in whenever they feel like it?'

'Sheila's sister Mary is a practising wicca, she and a friend found a spell that mimics the boundaries of a home. It basically means that vampires can't come into the warehouse unless someone who's living here invites them.' Martin shrugged his slender shoulders. 'I don't really understand it, but I'm not about to start arguing.'

The back room of the factory, once a meat storage area, had been scrubbed down and turned into a treatment room and operating theatre. Curtains hung around the edges; most were open, showing an odd mix of camp beds, inflatable mattresses and other makeshift sleeping arrangements. One section by the left-hand wall was closed off and Angel heard a faint cough from behind the thick fabric.

Sheila and a guy in green scrubs were working on an unconscious blond woman, hooking her up to an IV. There were a few others helping the factory survivors find places to lay down or rest, cleaning wounds and splinting broken bones. One woman was handing out cups of water.

'This is an impressive set-up,' Angel said to Martin, who had begun examining an injured man's neck wound.

'We do what we can,' Martin said, gently applying gauze to the wound. 'We managed to salvage a lot of equipment from the hospitals, but they're pretty much a no-go zone now and our supplies are starting to run low.'

'I can get you some more,' Angel said. 'Just tell me what you need.'

Martin paused, looking up at him. 'I'd really appreciate that,' he said, nodding.

'How are things here?' Giles asked.

'Not great,' Martin shrugged, standing. 'We lost Ben tonight.'

Giles sighed. 'I'm sorry to hear that. He'll be sorely missed.'

'Yeah, we need all the doctors we can get,' Martin agreed. Something in his face softened as he said, 'Plus I kinda liked him.'

'What happened?' Giles asked quietly.

'He was out on a sweep, his car was hit by a vampire raiding party. Oh, that reminds me - I was going to introduce you to our new guy…' he trailed off, looking around. 'Funny, he was here just before you arrived; he must have gone to lie down or something.'

'Who is he?' Giles asked.

'You'll never guess – he's from the Watchers' Council in London, says he's come to help on the front lines. Poor guy was out with Ben on the sweep - his first night out and he barely got back alive.'

'He's from the Council? What's his name?'

'Roderick Eaves. Said he knew your name but you'd never met.'

'Eaves…that rings a bell,' Giles frowned. 'Wait – no, I must be mistaken.'

'What is it?' Angel asked.

'I'm sure it's nothing, really,' Giles said. 'Only I could've sworn I heard that a man named Eaves was killed in the line of duty a few months ago.'

'He's looking well for it,' Martin smiled. 'You must be thinking of someone else.'

'I suppose so,' Giles muttered. 'Well, perhaps I'll come by tomorrow and meet this mystery man, but for now I must get back to the others. Angel, are you coming with me?'

'No,' Angel said. 'I'm gonna head back to the factory to help Buffy. I just want to look around here first, make sure nothing else is lurking outside.'

'Very well,' Giles said. 'Martin, thank you yet again for - '

'Welcome,' Martin interrupted with a smile. 'Get yourself home.'

'Yes,' Giles smiled, nodding at Angel before leaving.

'Where did you say this Watcher is?' Angel asked Martin.

'He must be resting, his bed is over that way,' Martin said, nodding towards the closed-off section. 'Why?'

'Not sure,' Angel admitted. 'Something just feels off; Giles doesn't strike me as someone who's wrong all that often.'

'No, he's not,' Martin frowned. 'What are you going to do?'

'I just want to have a talk with this Eaves character,' Angel said, something menacing in his voice.

Leaving a bemused Martin behind, Angel stalked toward the closed curtains. When he twitched them aside, he saw only a black woman in blood-stained scrubs sleeping fitfully on a blow-up camping mattress.

Angel looked around, his eye catching on a narrow corridor leading off into the shadows. Hackles rising with every step, Angel moved along it, demon face itching to emerge.

Eventually the corridor ended in a steel door, which opened noiselessly into an empty parking lot. Angel stood still, inhaling deeply, and caught a faint scent from behind a stack of rotting boxes. A growl rose in his throat; the scent was human, but tainted with something foul. He strode over and pulled out a cowering man from behind the stack of boxes. He was in his 40s, lean and greying, dressed in a very un-Watcher-like silver and black shirt.

'Who are you?' Angel asked harshly.

'Roderick Eves,' the man stuttered. 'I'm a Watcher, from London.'

'Then why do you stink of Chaos?' Angel asked, voice as cold as his flickering yellow eyes.

'Ah, I see – vampire, are you?' the man said with a smile, relaxing both his stance and his accent. 'Why didn't you say so, mate? I'm on your side!'

'You are?' Angel asked, playing along. 'My mistake.' He let the man go, watching as he straightened his shirt and smoothed his hair with both hands. 'So now that we're friends, why don't you tell me your real name?'

'Ethan Rayne,' the man said with a proud smile, which faltered when Angel didn't react. 'What, your Master didn't tell you about me?'

'No.'

'Typical. Well, you're in luck; looks like we just got a fresh delivery. Give me an hour to get the decks cleared, then I'll give you the invite to send the boys in.'

'What are you being paid?' Angel asked, putting together the pieces from what Martin had said.

'The usual – fifty a head and a hundred for the doctors.' Ethan's eyes narrowed. 'You do have the money, I hope?'

'Don't worry,' Angel said. 'You'll get what you're owed.'

'Good stuff,' Ethan grinned, backing towards the door. 'Well, I'd best get back inside before I'm missed. See you in an hour.'

Angel turned to look out at the moonlit water, running over the alternatives in his mind. He had to get back to Buffy, but he couldn't leave Martin and the others oblivious to the threat in their midst. He was reluctant to kill a human, even someone as rotten as Ethan Rayne, but he'd heard that the Watchers' Council had their own armed forces that may prove useful. If Rayne was working as part of a gang, they'd need to question him to find out how deep it all went.

Angel heard the faintest creak of hinges behind him and began to turn when he felt something sharp and cold thud into his back, inches from his heart. Angel snarled, vamped out and leapt for Ethan, standing in the doorway with a crossbow, but to his horror he slumped in mid air to crash down hard.

'Oops, missed the heart,' Ethan said blithely. 'My aim's not what it used to be; that's why I use a paralysing agent on the bolts.' He took a step closer. 'You must think I was born yesterday - I saw you arriving with Ripper. Did you really think I'd let you disrupt this cosy little setup?'

'They'll find out,' Angel gasped, limbs seizing up.

'Probably,' Ethan agreed, 'but I'll be long gone by then.'

Angel watched, helpless, as Ethan loaded another bolt and took a few more steps to stand right above him. 'Wouldn't want to miss a second time, that would be so embarrassing,' Ethan smiled, raising the crossbow. 'Ta ta.'


	9. Chapter 9

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: Most of these characters aren't mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement. Please take a minute to review - thanks :o)

**Chapter Nine**

Angel woke to a world of pain. His head hurt and a dull, energy-sapping ache radiated in waves from high up on his chest.

'Angel?' said a calm clear voice beside him. 'Can you hear me?'

'Martin?' Angel panted. 'What happened?'

'How much do you remember?'

'The Watcher,' Angel gasped out urgently, barely able to move for the pain wracking his body. 'He's not who he says he is…'

'I know,' Martin assured him. 'I followed you when you went outside, in case you needed back-up. I heard what he said to you, and when he attacked you I clocked him with a two-by-four. He's sleeping it off in a locked shipping container until we figure out what to do with him.'

'Thank you,' Angel rasped. 'I feel…I've been poisoned, haven't I?'

'I don't know,' Martin said frankly. 'Vampire physiology isn't something I'm an expert in, but I can't understand why it should be affecting you so badly. Mary, the wicca, took a blood sample while you were unconscious. She's going to run a trace analysis, see if it's a mystical poison. I called Giles too, he's going to speak to the Council.'

'What about Buffy?'

'I don't know anyone named Buffy.'

'You have to tell Giles,' Angel gasped, darkness creeping in once more. 'Buffy…she's alone with him…he'll hurt her, I know him…'

'Angel?' Martin's voice came down a long, echoing corridor; Angel sank kicking and screaming into blackness.

* * *

Cordelia glanced up at the clock for what felt like the hundredth time. 'What's taking them so long?'

'Will you relax and stick to the research?' Nancy said from the sofa, looking up from her book. 'It takes a while to get into town from here, and they had to find all the ingredients – they'll be back any time now. Besides, it's daytime, they'll be safe.'

'From vampires, sure,' Cordelia said, 'but what about the lousy demons that hang around waiting to sucker people in with their fashion smarts and smooth talking?'

'Don't worry, they're not that dumb,' Nancy said. 'Oh – sorry.' She reconsidered. 'No, actually, not sorry.'

'I'm _so_ glad our paths never cross in the real world,' Cordelia huffed, turning back to her book.

'Likewise,' Nancy muttered. 'And this is the real world.'

'Not for long,' Cordelia shot back. 'Wait, is that…?' She leapt up and flung the door open. 'Giles, Oz! Thank God, you were gone for so long!'

'It did take a little longer than anticipated,' Giles said, dumping two brown paper bags on the kitchen counter. 'Just put those down anywhere, Oz. Is Buffy not back yet?'

'No,' Cordelia sighed. 'We still can't find any clues about what's wrong with Angel, either.'

'Well sure, you'd have to have been actually researching for that to happen,' Nancy said acidly.

'I'm sure he'll be fine,' Oz interjected, looking meaningfully at Nancy. 'The Watchers' Council are looking into it.'

'Actually, they're not,' Nancy said. 'They called while you were out, said it wasn't their policy to cure vampires. Sorry, Giles.'

'Well, we can't afford to spend any more time on Angel, I'm afraid,' Giles said. 'We don't know whether Buffy's absence indicates success or failure against the Master, but either way we need to get on with this ritual and return the world to its rightful state.'

'Yeah, and send Malibu Barbie back where she came from,' Nancy said, standing.

'Will you stop?' Oz said to her, something steely in his voice. 'Cordelia didn't know this would happen, and she's doing everything she can to help.'

Nancy began to protest, then stopped, shoulders dropping. 'I know that,' she said quietly. 'I just can't stand this – pretty much everyone I ever cared about is dead, and now I know there's some better world somewhere that I can't even begin to imagine…it's just a lot.'

'It is,' Oz said gently. 'I know.'

'Sorry,' Nancy said, almost meeting Cordelia's eyes.

'Me too,' Cordelia said softly. 'For everything.'

'Well, yes, good…um, shall we get on?' Giles said, gesturing for help unpacking the paper bags. 'I have everything we need for the ritual, so I suggest we crack on with it and hope Buffy finds her way back here in time, should we need her.' He paused, a bundle of sage in one hand. 'I wonder what she's doing all this time – I do hope nothing evil has got a hold of her.'

* * *

'Get off me,' Buffy said, half-stern. 'How'm I supposed to get dressed if you keep' – she swatted his hand away – 'grabbing me?'

'Sussed out my cunning plan, then?' Spike grinned, enjoying the sight of a topless Slayer trying to extract her bra from a ceiling fan.

'You could help, y'know,' she said, clambering onto a chair.

'Yup. I'm enjoying all the jiggling for the moment, though.'

Buffy's glare was fierce. 'I can't believe we did that,' she said, finally getting her bra on and grabbing her top from the floor. 'What was I thinking?'

'You weren't, that's what was so great about it – it was all instinct and heat, teeth and claws…' Spike's pants stirred again as he recalled the image of her golden body arching above him, the tip of her stake pressed against his chest, his hand slipping between them to touch her most sensitive spot…

'Yeah,' Buffy said breathily. 'I mean, no! God, the Master could've walked in on us and I wouldn't have even noticed!'

'Cheers, luv,' Spike said, pleased.

'That's of the bad,' Buffy clarified slowly. 'And I'm not your 'luv'.'

'S'pose not,' Spike agreed, with a pang of guilt as he suddenly recalled Drusilla's words; _Don't leave me…don't go to that nasty little girl..._

'I have to get back to Giles,' Buffy said, slipping her boots on.

'Don't you wanna stay and play some more?' Spike hazarded, reaching out for her.

'Not now, not ever,' Buffy said, stomping past him. She paused, turned her head to glare at him over her shoulder. 'The next time I see you, I stake you. Got it?'

'Suit yourself,' Spike called after her, yanking on his t-shirt, 'but you can bet Angel wouldn't go down on you like that!'

Silence greeted him.

Spike shrugged on his duster, took his smokes out of the pocket and lit one with a mighty inhale. 'Well I never,' he mused aloud. 'Who'da thought shaggin' a Slayer'd be even better than killing one?'

* * *

Martin looked on helplessly as Angel writhed and contorted in agony. Beside him stood Sheila, calm and impassive.

'I can't watch this,' he said finally, turning away. His eye caught movement in the doorway, and Mary appeared from the shadows.

'Did you find anything?' Martin asked eagerly.

'Yeah, I think I know what's wrong with him,' Mary said slowly, eyes fixed on Angel. 'From what I can tell, it's a mystical poison that's literally called 'Killer of the Dead'. It's specifically meant to kill vampires.'

'So what's the cure?' Martin asked.

'I could only find one reference,' Mary said softly. 'He'd have to drain the blood of a vampire slayer.'

'But that's impossible,' Martin said. 'There's no way he can do that.'

'Oh well, what a pity,' Sheila said arms folded, face stony. 'One less vampire in the world.'

'Not now,' Mary said warningly, but it was too late.

'This man saved all these people,' Martin exploded, gesturing towards the factory survivors, 'not once, but twice! He saved me, and you, and Giles, and who knows how many others! I know he's a vampire, but he's also a good man, and I didn't become a doctor to stand around watching good people die!'

'Good man!' Sheila snorted. 'I still don't buy that a vampire can even have a soul, let alone become anything other than a killer. Whatever he was doing here, I'd be willing to bet he had an ulterior motive.'

'Well, if he did, he's paying for it with his life,' Martin said darkly.

Angel moaned, loud enough to attract attention from everyone in the room. His face was drawn into a rictus of pain, the muscles in his arms spasming uncontrollably.

A petite redhead with a large piece of gauze taped to her throat hesitantly approached. 'Is he…what's happening to him?' she asked Martin.

'He's dying, Emma,' Martin said softly.

'But…there must be something you can do,' Emma insisted, eyes welling up with tears. 'He saved us all…he just waded in there to fight them, he almost got himself killed but he still defended us…we can't just let him die!'

'He's already dead,' Sheila said meaningfully, glaring at Martin before stalking away.

Angel groaned again, the sound rising to a roar of pure agony. His eyes fluttered open, wild with pain, and he hissed through gritted teeth, 'Help me…please…'

Emma began to sob and Martin clenched his teeth so hard his jaw ached. They watched, hearts like stones, as Angel slowly, gently, dissolved into dust.

* * *

'Stupid, arrogant, irritating jerk,' Buffy muttered to herself as she stormed toward the exit. _Also – sexy, eager, talented…oh God, his mouth…the things he can do with his tongue…_

A cold, wrinkled hand clamped over her mouth, powerful arms enfolding her. Buffy struggled, driving her elbow backwards, but it barely made an impact.

'Hello Buffy,' said a voice in her ear, laden with ancient menace. 'Care for a bite?'

A chill mouth closed on her neck and Buffy felt herself falling, hitting the concrete. A heavy weight pressed on her back and her struggles got weaker as her life rushed out through two small points in her neck. Fireworks went off behind her eyes; a dark curtain began to fall.

The weight lifted suddenly and Buffy flopped onto her back, gasping. The Master's hideous face appeared above her; the look he gave her was dismissive, almost pitying.

'As it is written,' he said triumphantly, 'so shall it be. Pity, really, I was hoping for a little more of a fight.'

'I'm not done yet,' Buffy gasped, drawing her last stake. To her horror, she couldn't seem to sit upright. Her head was swimming, her body heavy and sluggish.

The Master laughed a dry, mocking laugh. 'Perhaps not, but you soon will be. Idiot humans, always letting your lusts and desires get the best of you.'

'What?' Buffy whispered.

'Oh, I heard you,' the Master smiled nastily. 'You and Spike, all night long. Funny thing, I would never have pegged you for the passive kind – "Spike, harder!"' he falsettoed. '"Hurt me, Spike, more!"'

'Shut up,' Buffy hissed, eyes filling with tears of pain, shame, frustration. Her fingers felt numb and she almost lost her grip on the stake.

'What really makes me laugh,' the Master went on, bending to glare down at her, 'is your choice of partner - William the Bloody? Even you could do better.'

'I said SHUT UP!' Buffy yelled, suddenly standing upright, anger giving her strength. The Master's beady eyes widened in shock as her stake drove through him, the tip emerging from his back.

'Wow,' Buffy mumbled, watching the Master's skeleton collapse as the stake fell from her nerveless fingers. 'Go me.'

With that, she slumped to the floor.

* * *

'Stubborn, smart-mouthed little prick-tease,' Spike muttered to himself as he stormed towards the basement steps. _Also – hot, tight, ball-achingly beautiful…and adventurous, God, the things she let me do…_

Spike paused, scenting fresh human blood. 'Hmm, what's this – did Saint Angel miss one?' he wondered out loud. He turned his head, trying to find the source; it was somewhere near the door he'd snuck in by last night. _Excellent – spot of breakfast, then find a way home through the sewers._

Spike turned a corner and saw Buffy lying beside the scattered parts of an ancient-looking skeleton. She was breathing, barely, but her eyes were closed and she was pale as death.

'Bloody hell,' Spike exclaimed, hurrying to her side. 'What's all this, luv - is that the Master? I'm impressed.'

Buffy's eyelids fluttered open. 'Spike,' she whispered through bloody lips. 'Help me.'

'Can't do that, pet - we're ancient enemies, you and me,' he said regretfully, smoothing her hair from her brow. 'Besides which, you keep forgetting that I'm evil; murder, destruction, death of the innocent…s'what I do.'

'So you're gonna just leave me here?' she asked, huge eyes full of tears.

_Don't leave me…_

_If she doesn't come back alive, you don't get the key…_

Spike shrugged, stood, turned away.

'I knew I should've staked you,' Buffy mumbled, eyes falling closed. The last thing she was aware of was the smell of cigarette smoke.


	10. Chapter 10

**If Wishes Were Horses…**

Disclaimer: Most of these characters aren't mine, I'm just using them for my own amusement.

Please take a minute to review, it means a lot to me – thanks :o)

**Chapter Ten**

'Are we all ready?' Giles asked. Everyone nodded, though none of them really looked it.

'You okay?' Oz asked Cordelia.

'Fine,' she smiled tightly. 'Let's just do this.'

Giles stripped the leaves from a sprig of sage and dropped them into the golden goblet smouldering in the centre of the table. Bags and pots filled with herbs and powders were laid out around it, the air thick and heady with the mingled scents.

'Oh, Anyanka, I beseech thee,' Giles recited, looking nervously around. 'In the name of all women scorned, come before me.'

'Giles,' Oz muttered, nodding toward the darkness beneath the staircase. A figure was emerging, the silhouette that of a young woman. As she stepped into the light her features were illuminated, the crags and craters outlined in shadow.

'That's her,' Cordelia gasped. 'Eugh, I'd forgotten the extent of the hideousness.'

* * *

Buffy knew she was about to die. She didn't feel pain any more, didn't feel cold, didn't feel afraid or angry or sad. Everything was fading into darkness and peace. Somewhere up above a shaft of light opened up, a sense of love and finality washing over her...

A flash of heat and pain seared through her chest. She resisted it, straining toward the light, but it came again, jolting her whole body.

With a gasp, Buffy opened her eyes.

'She's back,' said a voice above her; she turned her head to see a paramedic crouched beside her, defibrillator paddles in his hands.

'Okay, let's get her loaded up,' said another voice. 'Good job we got here when we did, another few minutes she'd be a goner. Too bad the caller didn't leave a name, I bet she'll want to thank him.'

'Yeah,' said the first voice. 'But how hard can it be to find a guy with a North London accent in Sunnydale, right?'

* * *

'Do you have any idea what I do to a man who uses that spell to summon me?' Anyanka prowled towards Giles, turning to face Cordelia. 'Or to any mortal foolish enough to insult me?'

'I take it back!' Cordelia gasped. 'Oh, and the wish? I take that back, too!'

'It's too late for that,' Anyanka sneered.

'Okay then, I wish I'd never made that stupid wish in the first place!'

'You only get one, child, but nice try.' Anyanka smiled, centuries of pain in her eyes. 'I had no idea your wish would be so exciting!'

'So Cordelia can't reverse it?' Giles asked. 'Then what price to grant us a new wish?'

'You tiresome man,' Anyanka said, grasping him by the throat and shoving him up against the wall. 'You think you can bargain with Anyanka?'

Giles began to choke, and Oz rushed to help. With barely a glance, Anyanka back-fisted him hard enough to knock him out cold.

'Oz!' Cordelia cried out, rushing to his side. 'Oh, Oz, please don't be dead!'

Nancy hit Anyanka in the back with a mace as hard as she could, but the demon barely flinched. 'Don't test me, child,' she rasped, knocking Nancy to the floor.

Grasping at the hands around his throat, Giles noticed Anyanka's pendant glowing in the low light. _Of course! _he thought, _the pendant is her power centre! _'Nancy,' he whispered, breath fading, 'the…pend…ech…'

'What?' Nancy asked, struggling to her feet in a daze.

'Well done,' Anyanka whispered to Giles with one last powerful squeeze, 'but not quick enough.' She stepped back from the wall, letting Giles's body drop.

'No, Giles!' Cordelia moaned, overcome with grief and tears.

'Anyanka,' Nancy said, bravely stepping forward. 'I wish that - '

'You are not a woman scorned,' Anyanka interrupted, turning towards her.

'Actually, I am,' Nancy said, voice wobbling around the lump in her throat. 'I've been in love with Oz for so long I can't remember what it's like not to love him, and I was just starting to think that one day he might even want me too.' She paled as she glanced at Oz's motionless form, voice hardening as she went on, 'Then Queen Cordelia shows up and suddenly I just fade into the background. So I want her gone; I want a reality where I don't have to feel this way.' She summoned her courage, facing Anyanka squarely. 'I wish that Cordelia Chase had never made this wish, and will never make another for the rest of her life.'

'Done.'

* * *

The California sun shone down on the crowds of brightly-dressed kids milling around the Sunnydale High School quad. Cordelia turned to Anya and said, 'I wish Buffy Summers had never…no, wait, why'm I wasting my time wishing? I'm Cordelia Chase – I don't react, I act!'

'But, you said – what were you gonna wish?' Anya called after her, but she was gone in a cloud of Chanel No 5.

'Great,' Anya grumped. 'I thought I had that one for sure.'

Turning, she spotted Jonathan sitting on the steps nursing a gigantic soda, doing his best to ignore Harmony and her clone friends tossing out some hurtful barb as they went past.

Anya smiled consideringly. 'I don't usually do men,' she mused aloud, 'but Hallie's always telling me I need to diversify…'

Mind made up, she wandered across to him. 'Hey, small human,' she said, as friendly and normal as she knew how.

Jonathan checked behind himself. 'Are you talking to me?'

'Yeah, sure, why not,' Anya said briskly, sitting awkwardly beside him. 'So listen – don't you sometimes wish you were, like, some kind of superstar…?


End file.
